Honker's Ale

Dammit --- I didn't realize this was a bitter until I got it home.  But by then I didn't care.  Poured some up in a glass and went outside to empty the skimmer basket and catch some of the last rays of the day.  Ahhhhh, springtime in Arizona...

This was sweet like caramel but not too sweet. Carbonated just right. A very nice summertime session beer - I dare say this is best consumed outdoors in the shade on a warm day.

Honker's Ale (4.3% ABV)
Goose Island Beer Company
Chicago, Illinois

Rating:  4 out of 5 pint glasses

Bacon Day (with craft beer) in the Old Pueblo

After hearing about Tucson Bacon Day (I'll get to the details more in a minute), I opened up my trusty Google image search page and typed in "bacon" with the hope of finding some photos I could borrow (and give proper credit to) for this post.  But instead, I got mildly sidetracked by the top 9 suggested Google searches that appeared after typing the word bacon:

• bacon pancakes
• bacon seed
• baconator
• bacon condoms
• bacon sandwich
• bacon camo
• bacon and eggs
• bacon roses



www.funnyjunk.com

• bacon equality

Whaaaaaaaaaat?  Bacon condoms??!?  Bacon camo?  And bacon equality?!?!?!?!  Man, I LOVE the internet.  I must read about these three things.  So naturally, I did what most of you would do and started to chase a few of these topics down the rat hole known as the internet.

Bacon condoms ... are real.  And for sale.  They are made by the same company in Seattle, Washington that makes bacon lube.  Go figure.  Apparently both items started off as an April Fools joke but then once they realized they could make money off such an idea, they continued to produce and sell them.  For those who may be curious, the condoms are not made out of latex and not pig, but the goal is "to make your meat look like meat."  Oooooooooooooook.

Moving on to bacon camo.  Turns out this is way less interesting than it sounded because it's a Call of Duty thing which means I am instantly not interested anymore.  I don't play video games unless they are on my Super Nintendo.  Yes, you read that right...Super Nintendo circa 1990 (which I didn't get until 1995).  I was hoping it was some really awesome redneck hunting outfit - complete with bacon odor - that could be purchased for a good fast-talking friend of mine as a Halloween costume.  Turns out, it is not.  Stupid.

imgur.com

And finally, the last one that peaked my interest: bacon equality.  Ahhh yes, turns out this one is an alternative and bacon-friendly version of the equality graphic that the world was introduced to and bombarded with (thanks mostly to Facebook) in early April when the gay marriage arguments were made before the Supreme Court.  Turns out 95% of everyone on my friend list supports gay marriage.  Who knew?!?!  Or perhaps I should rephrase - 95% of everyone on my friend list was at least was willing to change their profile picture for 24-36 hours to appear to support gay marriage and equal rights.  Regardless of how I feel about gay marriage, I truly find it amazing how many of those pictures are no longer appearing as profile pictures of my friends and family members.  Not only that, but most of them literally only lasted 36 hours.  Which begs the question, do they really support equality or did they just want to jump on the bandwagon?  Does making a picture your profile picture that indicates you support gay marriage make you a better person?  Does it make you feel like a better person?  Social media (which I realize includes things like this blog) is so strange.  It's like being in high school again where people seem to do things to gain the approval of other people, most of whom are not actually their friends in the real world.  They are virtual friends.  Friends from the past.  Friends of friends that you met once or twice at a party.  I admit, I am guilty of feeling this way too from time to time.  I post a picture and then check to see who likes it or what people say about it.  But why?  Why do we care so much what our virtual friends think about us?

readwrite.com

But enough about that ... back to Bacon Day in the Old Pueblo (that's Tucson for you non-Arizonans)...

Bacon Day is May 18, 2013, from 12-4pm at Reid Park in Tucson.  Tickets are $25 for adults (includes bacon and commemorative tasting vessel) and $10 for kids ages 13-17.  Not sure, but it sounds like that means kids under 13 are free?!?  For $100, you get food + beer + tasting vessel.  Doesn't sound like a great value unless you think you can drink $75 worth of craft beer while slamming bacon dishes left and right.

Tickets can be purchased from the event website with the always unpleasant service fee.
http://www.arizonabaconfest.net/

Fretzy's Unfiltered Pale Ale

As long as I can find it easily, this is always a staple in my beer fridge...

Fretzy's Unfiltered Pale Ale (5% ABV)
The Phoenix Ale Brewery
Phoenix, Arizona

Gluhwein with Father Christmas = Oktoberfest

Yup, purchased this one because I've been to Leavenworth, Washington.  December 2004 for work.  This is how my brain works.  I pick books by the cover art, I pick beers by the label art and/or geographic relevance to my life and I pick food off a menu based on my ability to make or not make the dish myself.  This means I pretty much order anything because I can't/don't cook.  My idea of cooking is a bowl of cereal with whole milk and a glass of orange juice (with pulp).

Oktoberfest Celebration Ale (5.5% ABV)
Leavenworth Biers
Olympia, Washington

The reason I picked this one up?  I drank Gluhwein with Father Christmas while in Leavenworth...

Gluhwein with Father Christmas in Leavenworth. Dec 2004.

Prickly Pear Braggot

**Disclaimer: this review is likely bias because we learned the hard way that this is not a beer for cellaring.**

Prickly Pear Braggot, Limited Release #1 (10% ABV)
Widmer Brothers Brewing Company
Portland, Oregon

As we poured this one up, the color looked beautiful.  The smell was sweet.  The taste was sweet like honey and thick in the mouth. The aftertaste was heavy and coating.  It was sweet.  Very sweet.  Too sweet.

I couldn't do it.  I tried.  I tried it super cold -- bleh.  I tried it at room temp -- ugh.  And I tried it warm (just to give it one last chance) -- nope.  So after 3 strikes for this beer, I did the next best thing and got out a small dish, poured the beer in and put it on the floor for my beer-loving dog.

This is exactly how I felt about the beer.  After drinking about a half glass, I just stared at the bottle.  Except, unlike my dog, I was reading the words.  I was disappointed.  It seemed like it had a lot of potential.

Rating:  refer to pictures above.  Gus finished it, stared at the bottle and then sneezed so hard that I think a paw or two might have come off the ground.