Cask of continually disappointed

SanTan Brewery has so much potential.  But ever since the first time I went (shortly after they opened in 2007), I find that I am disappointed almost every time I leave.  The first time I went was with our brand new next door neighbors and their toddler son.  We were literally the only ones in there.  Our neighbor's son was like any other toddler and only had so much attention span.  He sat in a high chair at the end of the table with the 4 of us adults and at one point, the owner came by to ask us to keep him quiet because this "isn't a kid-friendly establishment."  Ummmmm ok, but you do know that you are located in the suburbs, right?  And people in the suburbs often have kids.  So....I'm not sure how this will work out for you.  Also, if you're not kid-friendly, why did you give us a highchair?

The location is great, the food is great and the crowd is great.  Notice I didn't say anything about their beer...

But I keep trying because I really WANT to like them.  It's one of the closest breweries to our house and they have french fries that are to die for.  Anyway, last time I went to SanTan, I saw this sign at the front...

...and I got a little excited at the idea of trying a Thin Mint cask beer because at the time, I was planning something similar for my next batch of homebrew.  I asked the waitress if they had any left and then asked for a sample.  She brought me what I asked for.  I tasted it.  It was good but I didn't detect any mint.  So I ordered one to see if maybe it just took more than a half sip for the full taste to appear.

I should point out that I am attempting this endeavor with a squirmy toddler in tow while waiting on The Husband to arrive.  On a side note: I ordered here a $5 kids meal of chicken tenders which came with 2 chicken tenders and a ramekin (thanks Avery) of applesauce with a soup spoon.  After figuring out how to fit a soup spoon in a ramekin, she plowed through the applesauce.  So I asked my waitress if I could have more applesauce.  Sure.  She brings out a slightly larger ramekin with applesauce.  On my bill....there's a $3 charge for extra applesauce.  What the hell?  Are you people nuts?  I'm drinking my  beer and still searching for the mint.  I'm convinced there is no mint.  But I confirm with my waitress that she brought me a Thin Mint and I order another one just to be sure I wasn't crazy.  Oh, and I might have had two coupons for $0.25 pints.  She brings me the same beer with no hint of mint.

A month or so later, I search for a description of this beer on the interwebs.  Straight from the SanTan website, I learn: "Thin Mint: We added some fresh mint leaves to Sex Panther, and the resulting chocolate/mint flavor is reminiscent of many people’s favorite annual cookie offering."

The Sex Panther is a double chocolate porter.  Does the photo above look like a double chocolate porter?  Nope.  I now am able to confirm what I thought previously ... the waitress brought me the wrong beer, TWICE.  

Come on SanTan.  Get it together.

Funky boozer

This beer is a BOOZER.  But it tastes so good you won't realize it is a boozer until you're already running your mouth about something you have no business running your mouth about.  Hence the name.

Deceit won a gold medal at the 2012 Great American Beer Festival in the Belgian-Style Strong Specialty Ale category.  I like it when beers win medals.  Especially when they are beers that I can get my hands on and enjoy.  But when I think of a beer winning a medal, I often imagine a cartoon version of a bomber of beer hopping up onto the stage to accept their medal, which is awkwardly draped around the neck of the bottle, and then the bottle stepping behind the microphone to give a speech, in which they inevitably thank the Brewmaster who made them, all the creative directors (by name, of course) and finally, their mother.

According to the brewer, this brew was made with a "high percentage of Pilsner malt and a unique Belgian yeast strain to present a sweet lemon character in the aroma." This citrus quality carries into the flavor and finishes with a slight tartness. The brewer instructs to serve at 50 degrees in a tulip glass...which we did.

Deceit Belgian-Style Golden Ale (9.4% ABV)
Funkwerks
Fort Collins, Colorado

Recommendations:  be prepared for this sneaky boozer

Ratings:  4.5 out of 5 pint glasses on the unofficial Suburban Suds rating system

Homebrew 4: Experimental Porter (ExPo)

My goal was to have first porter ready to drink in time for St. Patrick's Day.  I'm not Irish, but I celebrate and appreciate a good beer-based holiday just like everyone else.

I had been planning this one for a while.  It started off with a crazy idea from my sister but then morphed into something slightly different, but equally as experimental.  I started off with a slightly unusual porter that featured a chocolate grain and then added some French dark chocolate (85% cacao) and Reese's Peanut Butter chips.  Interestingly enough, despite being submerged in 155 degree liquid, the peanut butter chips never fully dissolved.  They melted a bit but still remained in chip shape.  Now that I've seen that, it makes me a bit uncertain of what is really in them...but I'm sure that I will continue to eat them by the handful.

It smelled so good that I thought twice before tossing my experimental ingredients in the pot.

Three and a half weeks later...I'll admit, I was nervous to try it.  The chocolate flavor is obvious, but not overpowering.  The beer finishes clean and dry.  The creamy peanut butter flavor is no where to be found, which was slightly disappointing, but I was also somewhat relieved because I wasn't sure what that would taste like...other than a milkshake.  I think it came out quite nice and have overall, I have received positive feedback from my group of volunteer taste testers.  Thank you loyal taste testers!!

Experimental Porter (5.1% ABV)
Suburban Suds Brewery
Chandler, Arizona

Rating:  4 out of 5 pint glasses on the unofficial Suburban Suds rating system.

Homebrew 3: Garbage Pail Cream Ale

Garbage Pail Cream Ale.  Based on the name, you may not think it sounds good, but like all my beers so far, the name is not a testament to the flavor so much as to the story of the beer.

Somewhere during the process of brewing this batch, I got a little too comfortable with the brewing process and tried to do a little multi-tasking around the kitchen.  This is a no-no.

Long story short: I pulled the grain bag out too early and threw it in the trash.  Thankfully I realized my error almost immediately and after yelling a few bad words, I decided what the hell --- and pulled it out of the trash and threw it right back in the pot. Twenty days later, I was able to taste my surprisingly delicious Garbage Pail Cream Ale and laugh at myself for my stupid mistake. 


For the record...the grain bag that went into the trash was sitting in a new trash bag on top of freshly deposited junk mail and not in a 5-day old trash bag full of raw chicken and dog barf.

Garbage Pail Cream Ale (~5% ABV)
Suburban Suds Brewery
Chandler, Arizona

Special thanks to my awesome neighbor for taking a quick picture of my beer in our freshly mowed front yard and making both of them look so sexy. You rock!


Rating:  based on the feedback I've received from all my generous neighborhood taste testers, I'm going to give this one a solid 4.5 out of 5 pint glasses on the unofficial Suburban Suds rating system.

Beer, cheese and cookies

After a hard powder day on the slopes, a stack of grilled cheese is like heaven.  Pair that with some Girl Scout cookies, a FANTASTIC beer and an outdoor hottub ... and life is good.

Saison du Buff (7.7% ABV)
Stone / Dogfish Head / Victory

Powder day at T-Bar

Mama's Lil Yella Pils (5.3% ABV)
Oskar Blues Brewery
Colorado